If love is an ocean wide
We'll swim in the tears we cry
They'll see us through to the other side
We're gonna make it
When love is a raging sea
You can hold on to me
We'll find a way tonight
Love is an ocean wide
I do love that song so very very much. It just reminds me of how awesome true love is. But I still find myself asking where on earth I can find that, because right now it seems so hard and elusive.
But I guess it'll come sooner or later (:
Sorry I've been so MIA and not posting, I haven't really had the time/have been quite lazy recently. But ironically right, recently I also haven't been up to much, really just going through the motions of J2 life and going to school and coming back home tired and doing church stuff like I've always been doing.
I think my life is in need of a bit of direction right now, other than like the obvious studying for A levels. So yeah my prayer request this week is that I'll have direction in my life! (:
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I saw this quote on Twitter recently -- two reasons why people change: either they have learned a lot, or they've been hurt too much. I think recently it's been much more of the latter for me. And I'm not sure if people realize but I think I've changed a lot recently. Becoming more introverted, definitely. Having a somewhat bleaker outlook on life? Stuff like that.
I hope, I wish, I pray that I can go back to how I was before because I liked where I was (in the good sense). I don't want to become this dour, stoic person who detaches himself from life because of whatever reason...
But at the same time I realize trying to be positive and thinking everything will work out all the time just doesn't cut it. It wears away your willpower layer by layer until you feel so worn and tired and you just want to give up. It's a horrible feeling, that every time you throw up this facade hoping to impact others and in the end it just gets discarded because nobody cares, nobody cares at all.
Sigh I really hope I can revert.
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On a more studious note, I really should start studying properly now! It's only just over a month before my CT2s arrive and I don't want to do badly for them. I shall post all my June holiday commitments here and that shall be it. (:
27 - 29 May - Farmstay retreat
I'm really looking forward to this! And I said as much during today's prayer meeting but I don't know why everyone was so cynical about it... )': I'm really hoping to be refreshed during this time so yeah fingers crossed that it will be up to my expectations I guess! Looking forward to a time of relaxing and fellowship with my fellow leaders!
31 May - PW group BBQ
Just a shoutout to my PW groupmates -- I REALLY MISS YOU GUYS. I think like even though I'm not as close to all of you as maybe Leeni for example, the PW process really helped us grow as friends and I can count on you guys being there for me when I need you guys. I am so psyched LEGGO.
1 - 3 June - RMUN
Another awesome edition of RMUN coming up! I've seen the delegates in my council at the 2nd briefing and they do indeed look really really promising so here's to an awesome debate throughout the three days! Oh and, look forward to working with my juniors in my council too!
11 June - GDOP ushering
Never done ushering before so this'll be a completely new experience but I'm ready for it! (:
14 - 16 June - Track chalet
I HOPE MY MOM LETS ME GO FOR THIS ): It'll be the last proper thing we do as a track J2 team! <3 you guyssssss.
14 - 19 June - Malaysia visit
And yes finally trip back to Malaysia to visit relatives/celebrate my grandmother's birthday! (:
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Alright, that's it from me today. This post is really quite long :O
Peace out (:
